Wednesday, July 08, 2009

that uh-oh feeling.

I was doing great.
I was making such great progress.
I was moving on.

Then I saw some facebook updates, and I had to check on you. I had to check if you were happy, and you look so happy. Seeing that sun in your eyes and that smile on your face just made me miss you so much more...

You know that feeling you get on roller coasters. I call it the "uh-oh feeling". It's kinda like "Uh-oh, I'm about to go down and around on this roller coaster really really really fast."
The thing is, I hate roller coasters. I used to love them, way back in the day, way back when I lived 15 minutes away from Disneyland. Rollercoasters were my thing back then. But now, I can't stand them. I hate that uh-oh feeling.

And maybe that's why I can't stand to see you so happy. I get that uh-oh feeling. It's kinda like "Uh-oh, I'm not moving on, and you look so happy. My heart is about to go really really really fast for a few seconds...." The thing is, I don't want to hate seeing you happy because it's all I've ever wanted.

All I've ever wanted was to be able to grow up and ride the big roller coasters. But now I hate them.
All I've ever wanted was to be able to look at you and not get those butterflies or that uh-oh feeling. But now I hate that I do.


PS. My girl, Chels, made a website just for dancers!! This is going to be a huge hit, but only if you all help make it happen!! Please support her new site, and I'll definitely be a big help with it. You all should too!!


chels_fearless said...

bria! your SOOOOOOOOOO sweet! im totally nervous right now! i keep wondering what people are gonna think about it! : )
you have seriously made my day! : )

thankies so much!
have fun in richmond!


hopingforbetterdays. said...

I know what you mean, bud :]