Tuesday, September 29, 2009


"hey guys! wanna see my pokemon cards?!?!"

Today was Nerd Day! I'm can't help but be cute all the time, so I'm not as nerdy as some people were today. That's my little bro's Pokemon shirt + my old catholic school skirt. It made a great outfit for a windy day...NOT. But a lot more people dressed up today than yesterday. People really get into the spirit days; it's so awesome. A girl was walking around today with a "Kick Me" sign on her backpack and introducing herself to everyone then exclaiming "I have friends!". It's such a fun time of the year. I love it.
Tomorrow is Magical Day. And I'm not going to reveal what I'm going to be...you'll just have to see!

What also happens this week is the junior + senior stars are hung up in the cafeteria. The stars are blue + gold (school colors); the seniors are gold and the juniors are blue. I haven't been able to find my star quite yet, but just knowing that I'm one of those stars up there is unbelievable. I just can't believe that I'm a junior already. High school isn't the best thing in the world, but now I'm wishing that it wouldn't end. Just yet. But it's really interesting to see all the people you went to elementary and middle school with have grown up. How they all took their own paths. How they all change. How they all move on.

The universe is out of wack this week.
Tonight was the first day of rehearsals at the theatre. And quite frankly, it didn't go very well. I didn't have a good warm-up class. People weren't remembering things. People were frantic. We were blanking out and not miming like were supposed to. And Pedro was getting upset. I don't blame him though. It was a disaster. And all I could think was "Oh no, this isn't good..." but I looked around, and I saw everyone disappointed. Disappointed in themselves, and possibly disappointed in all of us as a whole. But then I thought about all the rehearsals we had. All the hours we spent learning and working on this production. We wouldn't be there if we didn't want to work. If we didn't want the show to go on. Every single person is there because they want this. They want the show to go on. So, from that point, I thought positive. I wanted this show to be great. I want everyone to believe in themselves and in this company. I just don't want all that hardwork to go to waste because of one bad rehearsal. We got let out early tonight. Probably because we needed to go home and rest and think about what we need to do for the rest of the week. But I stayed after to watch some of the others work on "driving" the trains. They are working so hard, and I think that the rest of the week is just going to be delightful. I'm not giving up. Not in this lifetime.

The universe is just soooo out of wack. But I have to remember that we each have our time. The universe is like a roller coaster. It's up and down for everyone. It's just not in our favour this week. I keep thinking about the way you kissed me and the way you held me and the way you breathed in my ear. It's all good fun. But I've been seeing you all week, and I can't help but smile at the little things you do that I just love. The way you smile only halfway when you're nervous. The way you make those silly faces at me when you see me in the hallway. The way you wait for me after class just to talk. Just so I can walk with you to your car. That's the way I want to remember you. I don't want to think of the two-faced, ignorant, selfish person you've become because that's not who you are. That's not who I want you to be. That's not who you want to be. I want to remember you the way you were when you were with me.
But we can't have everything we want.


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