Friday, November 13, 2009


"well, you know what really sucks about falling for a guy you know you're not right for? you fall anyway because you think he might turn out to be different."--Mary; from "Another Cinderella Story"

I was being a lame little girl tonight and decided to watch "Another Cinderella Story". Although I thought most of the movie was stupid + juvenile, a couple of things caught my eye. The fact that it was all about dancing and the passion behind it is always a plus. We all have those days where we have to stop and ask ourselves if we really want to be dancers and why we're doing this. And then we stop sitting and wondering and just get up dance because words can't even explain how dancing makes you feel. And of course, the other thing that grabbed my attention was the fact that there relationships have no limit's. But this quote made me stop and think for a little bit. Because it's so true. Many times I've put myself out there. Put my heart on the line. With the highest hopes and the best intentions. And even though I want nothing more than to let him into my life and just admit that I like him, it's hard because I just know that it's probably not going to end the way I want it to. Because that's the way it always is.
And I'm just trying to figure out how my Cinderella story is going to end. Will I ever end up with Prince Charming? Will I ever go to that perfect ball and dance the night away? Will he sweep me off my feet? Will I really be happy in the end? I can't say for certain how everything is going to end, but I do know that I have my own Cinderella story. And it will end up the way it's supposed to. Eventually.

On the way home today, I was with a couple of friends of mine (they're twins!) and we were talking about how the boy that wants you and the boy you want are never the right person. It's a frustrating matter, and you just can't help but feel sorry for yourself for having to deal with the ones that want you, but still try to get the boy that you want. And I brought up the fact that if you think about it, what do those boys feel like? They're going to feel the same exact way. I know that they're going to be just as frustrated with a girl that they can't have. And even though it feels like us girls are always doing the chasing, think about that one boy you know has something for you. He's doing some chasing of his own.

It seems like I've found my match, but that's what makes it so much harder to find time for the both of us to spend time together. But we will someday soon. Besides, his birthday is coming up...

I am the busiest little body you will ever know. I put so much stress on this little body of mine, and thankfully all my hardwork pays off in the end. School is always a big stress on me. But it's always around this time of the year that stresses me out the most. Because it's almost midterm. It's Nutcracker season. My muscles are all tight because of the weather. I'm knitting + crocheting hats to keep the money rolling in. Auditions for summer programs start in January. I need to start taking SATs next spring. College stuff is just around the corner...and when will I ever get a chance to settle down for just a few minutes and BREATHE?!

Sunday is the orchestra performance. I'm rolling on a tennis ball as I type. While wrapped up in my snuggie. I'm going to decorate a pair of pointe shoes to donate to the boutique tomorrow. I just love being a ballerina.

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