"and that's the thing about people who mean everything they say. they think everyone does too." - khaled hosseini
I meant it every single time I said, "I like this." or "I just like spending time with you." I meant it when I said, "I forgive you." I mean everything I say because I know that whom ever I'm telling it to would want the sincere truth.
When you said, "I want you." and "I'm most comfortable around you." I believed it. Even after all the lies and excuses you told me a long time ago. Because the truth is: you never stop loving someone. I love you for the fact that you're not perfect and that we're the weirdest when we're together. But the other truth is that you don't want me. And I don't like the thought of that. But I also don't like the thought of not loving you.
Today was a long day at rehearsal. We're putting all the little pieces together for Coppelia which is coming up in three weeks!! It's just right around the corner, and I just know that it will be sooner than we expect! Everyone is working so hard to learn the parts and understand the ballet (because this isn't a very well known ballet). It's so refreshing to see people working as hard as you are. It's so motivating to see one of your peers doing so well when they dance. It's so inspiring when I see the company director, Pedro, putting everything he can into this production because he loves us. The company has become my family, and this is why I love my life so much.
Tomorrow is the Footnotes scholarship audition!! I've prepared my Balanchine variation as well as my own choreographed piece. And for some reason, I'm getting a little nervous. I know that I've practiced many times for this, but for some odd reason, I don't feel ready. But I think I'm just overreacting....Wish me luck!!
PS. Today is also my best friend, Dylan's, birthday. Have a wonderful one, my Dyl pickle!!