Sunday, October 31, 2010

a senior bond fire + a halloween rave.


This weekend was a crazy one!!
On Friday, the seniors of the Senior Company got together to have a bond fire. Yes, a bond fire. We did some very much needed bonding around a campfire in my friend's backyard out in the middle of the boonies. Out there, there's no cell signal, rarely anywhere to shop or go out to eat, a lot of woods and farms, and not much high-speed internet (my friends that live out there are lucky that they do!). It's almost a different place out there. Normally, I would freak out without the cell service, but it was really nice to just hang out with the girls and really focus on spending more time with each other before we...gulp...graduate. We all agreed that it was all coming too soon, and that we were all going to keep in touch forever.



The next morning, Saturday, we got ready for company rehearsal. I love company rehearsal at the studio because everyone gets into it. We all dress up, and even Pedro + Rebecca participate by dressing up! And not to mention, the big bowls of candy to pig out on during rehearsals! My best friends and I dressed up as the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles! This year, the costumes got really creative! There were a lot of group costumes. There was a group of dancing cows, Power Rangers, and Minnie Mouses! It definitely made rehearsal a lot more interesting!
We're really pushing through with company rehearsals these days considering that Nutcracker is in about 5 more weeks!! I can't believe it!! I'm even performing Arabian next this Friday at an Arts Council. We're about to enter the "busy season" known as Nutcracker season. It really is my favorite time of the year because everyone in the community gets so involved with helping out the company and supporting all the dancers. It truly brings joy to my heart to be a part of such a supportive environment and family.


Then after yesterday's rehearsal, John, Courtney, and I rushed to my house to get ready for Tai + Dakota's Halloween Rave that they've been getting ready for the past two months. I am so proud of both Tai + Dakota for getting so many people to their rave and handling all troubles that go along with throwing such a huge party. But it was a blast, and it turned out really well. There were probably over 100 people there altogether, and I have a feeling that word about this one will get out to more people, making the number grow even more. John dressed up as Deadmau5 (one of both John and my favorite DJs), and he even got to help DJ last night. It was his first time DJing for a party ever, and I can tell that he was having a blast. And not to mention, people thought he was cool, so he's getting to meet a lot more people...can't blame my excitement - he's homeschooled.
Courtney is dressed up as a flight attendant. And me and my beau were a nurse and doctor. He definitely had the swagger of a doctor, even when he was mixing on the decks. It all went by too fast and ended too quickly, but there will be many more raves to come!

It has been an incredibly fun past two nights, but now I'm completely exhausted.
Too much fire, s'mores, ninja-ing, saving of lives, and raving.
I love my crazy life.

What did you do for your Halloween weekend?
xobria

Monday, October 25, 2010

narnia.


Behind my house, there's this little creek and some woods. And it looks like Narnia.
I've only shared my Narnia with one other person before you. But the fact that you embraced every bit of it made it special and more memorable.

xobria

Sunday, October 24, 2010

slacker...

the morning after an all-nighter with the best friends <3
I know I've been really slacking with the blogs. My life is getting crazier and crazier everyday, so by the time I have time to sit down and write a little bit for zee blog, I end up falling asleep in front of the computer with a half written blog post. So I must apologize for all the late posts put up throughout the past few days. (I made sure to finish all my AP Bio homework early today just so I could get a real post in tonight.)

Company rehearsal have been very productive lately with getting Nutcracker parts situated and learned. This year, I will be dancing the usual-Snowflake, Violet (Waltz of the Flowers), and Arabian Soloist. Ever since my first Nutcracker in 4th grade, I've dreamt of being the Arabian Coffee soloist. That very first Nutcracker, I was an Arabian corp dancer, and I watched the Arabian soloist and wished to be as good as her some day. Eight years later, I'm a senior, and I'm that girl. Maybe I'm that girl that the others are looking up to, yet I still don't feel that old or technically mature. It still has not hit me that I'm a senior...
Rehearsals are really going well. Everyone is building up their stamina and toe strength for Snow, and we are busy polishing Waltz of the Flowers. Many performances have been announced this weekend as well. And I will be performing Arabian at an Art's Council performance on November 5th, Cinderella Act II variation at Nutcracker Ball, and Arabian once again at Dicken's of a Christmas downtown the first weekend of December. Which means my first performance for this Nutcracker season will be in a couple of weeks!!
Yesterday, I also reviewed and rehearsed the Cinderella variation that I learned back in January. And it's just the beginning for the real thing that will be happpening all the way in the spring. I could feel a difference in my strength from when I first learned this variation in January, and I owe it all to my stay in New York this summer. I learned so much this summer, and I feel myself as a grown and changed dancer. And it's all bittersweet that I won't be with the company much longer...


And now I'm just getting carried away. This has been a busy weekend. Next weekend is Halloween!! What are you dressing up as?!
xobria

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

i love gays.


I wore purple today.
For all the Mr. Pedro's in our lives.

xobria

PS. I had to...haha

Sunday, October 17, 2010

homecoming number two.





This weekend was my boyfriend's homecoming, and I couldn't say "no" to another night of dressing up, having a fun dinner, getting sweaty from dancing all night, and staying out until the break of dawn (I wish...). His school's homecoming was a lot different than my schools, but we had fun nonetheless.

I spent the rest of today working on a Physics project known as the Egg Launcher. My partner and I constructed (with A LOT of help from her dad) an egg launcher that will launch an egg (without breaking), and it pretty much just consists of a Pilates Theraband. The test runs today went pretty well, so I'm just hoping that it will work tomorrow...I hate Physics.

This weekend was insane...hell, you only live once!
xobria

Friday, October 15, 2010

"a beautiful poem for a beautiful girl."

Ode To A Naked Beauty
by Pablo Neruda

With chaste heart, and pure
eyes
I celebrate you, my beauty,
restraining my blood
so that the line
surges and follows
your contour,
and you bed yourself in my verse,
as in woodland, or wave-spume:
earth's perfume,
sea's music.

Nakedly beautiful,
whether it is your feet, arching
at a primal touch
of sound or breeze,
or your ears,
tiny spiral shells
from the splendour of America's oceans.
Your breasts also,
of equal fullness, overflowing
with the living light
and, yes,
winged
your eyelids of silken corn
that disclose
or enclose
the deep twin landscapes of your eyes.

The line of your back
separating you
falls away into paler regions
then surges
to the smooth hemispheres
of an apple,
and goes splitting
your loveliness
into two pillars
of burnt gold, pure alabaster,
to be lost in the twin clusters of your feet,
from which, one more, lifts and takes fire
the double tree of your symmetry:
flower of fire, open circle of candles,
swollen fruit raised
over the meeting of earth and ocean.

Your body - from what substances
agate, quartz, ears of wheat,
did it flow, was it gathered,
rising like bread
in the warmth,
and signaling hills
silvered,
valleys of a single petal, sweetnesses
of velvet depth,
until the pure, fine, form of woman
thickened
and rested there?

It is not so much light that falls
over the world
extended by your body
its suffocating snow,
as brightness, pouring itself out of you,
as if you were
burning inside.

Under your skin the moon is alive.

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

things that change.


Recently, I have started the re-reading of one of my favorite books The Unbearable Lightness of Being by Milan Kundera. It is such a deep and profound philosophical book, but it has made such an impact on me from the first time I picked it up that it quickly became one of my favorite books. But since this is my second time reading this book, I've noticed something this second time around. I'm noticing that I'm discovering things in the book that I seemed to have looked over the first time I read it. Reading this book for a second time has made me realize how much one can change in about a year - how they see themselves, what they see in the world, what they expect from life, what they expect from others, and what they expect for themselves.

It was about a year ago when I first read this book. I remember at that time I was in a very bad and sad place called heartbreak. I had just had my heart broken by my first love because of lies and cheating. He deceived me, and I fell for it all in hopes that I would get exactly what I wanted. But in the end, I only saw us for what I wanted to see and what I only imagined us to be. This book left me crying every other page because I could relate a lot of things written to my life and my situation that I was in at the time. I remember connecting every single character and event to my life - he was Tomas, and I was Tereza. He was the disloyal one, and I was the one still holding on no matter what he did. He was the one that was good at lying, and I was the one that fell for every single thing. He was the light one, and I was the heavy one. Once I finished the book, things became clear again, and I slowly but surely moved on.

A year later, my heart has healed. And this new boy comes into my life and says that he just ordered this book off of Amazon.com. As soon as I heard the book title, something jumped in my heart - the thing that made me fall in love with this book and remember that about a year ago it was my cure. So my new boy and I formed our own little book club and began reading this book together. And like I said, the second time reading this has made me realize that I missed a lot of things the first time around. And I realized that I missed these certain things because the first time around I was only looking for words that would heal my heart, words that would help me move on, and words that would help take the pain away. Words that spoke of love, friendship, and true lightness stuck out to me this second time around. And this time, I saw myself as the very different character of Sabina. Tereza + Sabina are two very different characters, practically foils to one another. The ways in which I see myself as Sabina have made me seen how much can change and grow in such a short period of time as a year. When you least expect it, you will notice within yourself the change that you wanted to become.

xobria


Tuesday, October 12, 2010

the dream continues...


These are the beautiful pointe shoes Mr. Pedro has decorated for me. They will be my glass slippers for my role of Cinderella. Holding these pointe shoes in my hands made me realize that I'm going to have to really push myself when it comes to being Cinderella...five variations and two pas de deux's. It's never easy. But I'm very excited to take up the challenge, and I can't wait to become a princess at a ball. I will be performing the Act II variation at the Nutcracker Ball next month because Pedro will be announcing the production of Cinderella that night. I've always dreamt of being a leading role in a ballet, but I never imagined it to happen so soon. The hard work you put into something will certainly pay off.

Tonight, I had a rehearsal with John + Courtney to work on the scholarship dance I'm choreographing, and we finished it this evening! It took a few weeks of fun, yet productive, rehearsals to finish, and it's finally complete! I have applied for the choreography category of the Young Arts program, as well as the ballet and modern categories. I'm hoping that I will get some scholarships to help me with paying for college, and I know that every little bit will help! Now that the dance is finished, it's so amazing to see the final product of this vision of a dance that I've been dreaming up for a while now. At this point, it still a little mushy, but we've got a few more days to clean it up. We're filming it next Friday afternoon. I'm hoping to share it all with you very soon!

I have a strange feeling this week will fly by pretty quickly...
xobria

Monday, October 11, 2010

one. but we're not counting.

me: "time flies when you're having fun."
him: "yeah, don't want it to fly by too quickly though."

I seriously can't believe it's been a month.
And I know it's only been a month, but everything is going so swimmingly. We both decided that what we have found is something special that shouldn't be taken for granted. We're a friendship set on fire, that's for sure. We understand each other on the right level and even more. And for the longest time, I've been giving so much of myself away and never getting anything in return. It was so frustrating to me that it seemed like I would find someone I thought was right for me, but in the end, I knew I was only lying to myself. But this is real.

Sadly, I've had a lot of experience with bullshitters. I gave too much of my heart away for too long, and I never asked for anything in return. I did this in the hopes that my kindness and love would be enough to make something happen. I've learned that I tend to set my hopes too high and that led to my disappointment and heartbreak. My ideas of the perfect boy were altered and set very very high, and it lowered the chances of me ever finding anyone. I wanted someone that was like me - willing to give everything without asking for anything in return.
And I have found him.
One thing about him that I am so thankful for is all the little things he does for me. It makes my heart swell + melt. For all the right reasons, of course.

All the things that he does that leaves my heart in a puddle...
-DJ's and kills it on the mixing board + turntables.
-comes to pas de deux class at my studio with me.
-walk to the kids' section of Barnes + Noble with me just to look at the octopus books.
-talks about fashion with me. And he knows what he's talking about.
-admits that he hates math, but loves that I love it.
-buys me the perfect lunch.
-comes to my performances and makes his own bouquet of flowers from his home garden.
-makes his friends drive up a mountain just to see me.
-will think of a costume that will match mine for Halloween.
-read the Unbearable Lightness of Being so we can talk about it and sound intellectual.
-makes me rainbow cupcakes completely from scratch and brings me roses and seltzer water for my birthday.
-etc. etc. etc.

I'm not writing this to brag about my boyfriend. Or just to talk about him all the time. I'm writing this to tell all you girls what a real, nice boy does and you boys what you guys should do. It doesn't have to be extravagant or expensive. But it should be thoughtful, sincere, and simple. It should be real. Because if it's not real, then there's no point in doing anything with the relationship. Think about it.

So, happy one month, babe.
xobria

"love, whether newly born, or aroused from a deathlike slumber, must always create sunshine, filling the heart so full of radiance, this it overflows upon the outward world." - nathaniel hawthorne

loving life.


http://thingsweforget.blogspot.com/

I am very sorry that I took an unannounced leave from blogging. My blog has not been cooperating with me for a few days, and then I decided to take a little leave to focus on other things. But I have attempted to make videos apologizing for my absence to make it up to you guys, but they won't upload. So I've given up. But I'm back, and I have got quite a lot to talk about.

While I was away, certainly a lot has happened: getting sick, pulled my quad muscle, Dance Festival, more school, submitting my first college application, going to a recording studio (you will definitely be getting more information about this one...), and my birthday...but it's all too much to write about in one night.

I'll start off with dance festival...I have created the longest theatre week list while I was away, but I never got a chance to post it. So here it is (I wrote this on Sunday after the last performance):
-Teach me how to dougie. Seriously. I don't know how to.
-There is something about parking lots that just makes me feel so liberated...

-My boyfriend and I text in military lingo ("Roger that!", "do you copy?", ETA 1037, etc). Don't judge.

-Hump circles are the new squares.
-Skippy is a creep. But we love him.

-NASCAR racers got nothing on my quick change crew. They kick ass.

-Peeling a grape is a lot easier than you think. Actually, you do it everyday.

-My best friends and I tend to talk about boobs. Ours in particular.

-I love Barnes + Noble. The people that work there don't judge you! I know this because...

-I went to B+N and excitedly asked for books about octopi, and this kind lady escorted me to the kids' section to show me all the octopus books available. Thank you, Barnes + Noble.

-Remember when my boyfriend called me while I was backstage in the middle of a show to tell me that he was outside the back stagedoor with lunch? Remember when that lunch consisted of a pesto-tomato ciabatta sandwich + hot peach tea? I do.

-It's finally starting to get chilly and feeling like fall outside. I love it.

-Plank Friday has been postponed until next week.

-Taco Bell needs to stay open later.

-Vegetable chips can be a satisfying dinner.

-Remember when I got in trouble for making John pretend he was a pirate? I do.

-Tai's Custom Florists makes the best bouquets ever.

-I still can't get over how awesome a salsa bar is.

-I like awkward people.

-I hate paying for parking.

-I love re-reading The Unbearable Lightness of Being by Milan Kundera.
-I hate Physics.

-I hate feeling so tired and having to leave the theatre.

-I love you all <3


Just as a little side note: I got sick and pulled a muscle in my quad during theatre week. And still did four shows. The theatre is a magical place that makes dancing still possible with a sick stomach + a tight quad.
 
Continuing on...I have submitted my first college application to Florida State University. I'm still trying to arrange my trip to go there for my audition, but it will be very very very soon. I can't wait for college auditions to start, so I can tell you all about them!!
 
And the last thing I would like to talk about tonight is my experience at the recording studio. My sister is the singer in the family. She has the voice of an angel, and she wants to make music for the rest of her life. My mom and she arranged some recording time at this recording studio, and my sister requested that I play guitar for the demo she was to record. I agreed to the exhilarating experience of being in a recording studio. We played several songs together, and they all turned out pretty nice after just a few takes of each song. The gentleman helping us with recording put the songs together on a dandy CD sans editing and completely raw. And I'm very proud of my sister. However, she had mentioned to the recording studio owner that I write my own music. So he said that next time we go in together, he would like to hear some of my songs and put together a CD for me! I'm not really looking into making a music career out of what I write, but it would be very cool just to have a CD of all my music. I'll definitely keep my options open, but it will always be something that I do for fun and thoroughly love to do.
 
But that is all I'm writing for tonight. My warm bed is calling my name...
xobria
 
PS. I can't stop listening to Sigur Rós. Amazing.

Sunday, October 10, 2010

Sunday, October 03, 2010

my apologies...



An apology is necessary for not blogging for the past week.
And I must also apologize for my spazziness in this video.
It's been a long long long week...

This performance came so fast this year, and I still can't believe that it's already over. Another "first" to add to the list of "lasts". This weekend made me realize how much I'm going to miss this company, this family, that I've growing up with and grew to love.

And here's a very belated check-off list. I'll make it extra long just for all of you...
-Teach me how to dougie. Seriously. I don't know how to.
-There is something about parking lots that just makes me feel so liberated...
-My boyfriend and I text in military lingo ("Roger that!", "do you copy?", ETA 1037, etc). Don't judge.
-Hump circles are the new squares.
-Skippy is a creep. But we love him.
-NASCAR racers got nothing on my quick change crew. They kick ass.
-Peeling a grape is a lot easier than you think. Actually, you do it everyday.
-My best friends and I tend to talk about boobs. Ours in particular.
-I love Barnes + Noble. The people that work there don't judge you! I know this because...
-I went to B+N and excitedly asked for books about octopi, and this kind lady escorted me to the kids' section to show me all the octopus books available. Thank you, Barnes + Noble.
-Remember when my boyfriend called me while I was backstage in the middle of a show to tell me that he was outside the back stagedoor with lunch? Remember when that lunch consisted of a pesto-tomato ciabatta sandwich + hot peach tea? I do.
-It's finally starting to get chilly and feeling like fall outside. I love it.
-Plank Friday has been postponed until next week.
-Taco Bell needs to stay open later.
-Vegetable chips can be a satisfying dinner.
-Remember when I got in trouble for making John pretend he was a pirate? I do.
-Tai's Custom Florists makes the best bouquets ever.
-I still can't get over how awesome a salsa bar is.
-I like awkward people.
-I hate paying for parking.
-I love re-reading The Unbearable Lightness of Being by Milan Kundera.
-I hate Physics.
-I hate feeling so tired and having to leave the theatre.
-I love you <3

xobria