Friday, January 14, 2011

time to talk.

Last night I spilled my guts. I spilled it all to him. He is my boyfriend. He is my secret keeper. He is my best friend.

I wasn't expecting to spend the night, tell him any of the things I said, or cry on his shoulder like a pathetic little girl that I've become. I told him about my dark past and finally admitted that I hated the person that I became all because of one person - Heartbreaker. Heartbreaker changed me for the worse, and I knew it too. However, I didn't admit to the fact that I hate the person that I became because of him, and when I finally realized that I've changed too much in a bad way, I knew that I could start making some changes. I whispered and sobbed things that were kept in the very depths and darknesses of my heart. They were things that I never even told my best girlfriends, and he did the best thing to let me know that he was listening, understanding, and not judging a single thing I said or a teardrop shed.

I became an ugly person last year. I turned into someone that toyed with hearts, played games with lust, and lied to myself all because one person came into my life and changed me. He took advantage of my innocent curiosity and changed my pure thoughts of love, life, and sex, and that's the very reason why I hate Heartbreaker so much.

Also for the fact that he almost ruined electro/house music for me.

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